Chapter 21

Things were really going to take off now; I just knew it. I went to Santa Barbra and worked so hard. The guys put me up in an apartment for two months. There were some big named actors in this production. We did thirteen shows and sold out every performance.

The play was a major success and I won a Drama-Log award for my performance. Things are going to change, I know they are. While I was gone, The local paper ran a full page story on me with pictures and everything. I sat by my phone and waited for it to ring. It finally did; the director called me and told me that the top casting director of a major network wanted me to come to LA and audition for a movie of the week. I flew out there and they sent a car to pick me up. We went to the cafeteria for a sandwich then we walked across the lawn to where the audition was. I fell on the way there and completely forgot my lines in the audition.

I got home and waited for my phone to ring but it never did. I decided to take the bull by the horns and call the casting director. I called her so many times that she had to call my mother and tell her to put a muzzle on me. I was completely humiliated over that so I threw in the towel.

One day, Tom called and told me that there was a huge hurricane headed our way. “Oh there’s not” I said (like I would know? Tom’s an Air Traffic Controller for chrissake!) We drove three hours north and got out of the way of Hurricane Andrew.

The hurricane destroyed my apartment but my lease was up so I headed north. I moved in near Kathy and Tom’s home which was great because they were so much help to me.

I met a man at the airport and we became good friends. He had his pilot’s license and rented small planes and flew all over Miami. I went with him quite often and had so much fun. It was beautiful; we would fly along the beach or down to Key West, we’d take night trips. etcetera. He then got transferred to California.

I felt like a caged bird that need to spread it’s wings so I moved out and got my own place. I joined a local gym. Something was missing in my life though. I felt so alone even though I was surrounded by people so my solution was to buy a dog. I loved my little dog, Max, but he was a lot of work for me. I kept him seven years and then gave him to my neighbor. That was just another thing I couldn’t do so my drinking became heavier.

At the gym I met a news anchor for a local station. I gave her a tape of the play and my book and she wanted to do a story on me. She did the story then invited me to come watch her do a news broadcast. I imagined us becoming the best of friends after that: going shopping, out to eat, or to the movies. None of these things happened though. She never called me and the bottle became my only friend. I sank deeper and deeper into my depression and along with this, I drank more and more. Drinking was no longer fun.